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Re: The Final Game
Hi Afeefah. This short story is absolutely amazing. I really enjoyed reading it! My favourite bit was when the branches lashed out breaking that guys neck. It's really original and ...
Jul 6, 2009 -
Re: Upon Waking
I have to agree with the other reviews. Lots of the sentences are ordered weirdly and it is rather off putting. Apart from that though, I have to say that ...
Jul 6, 2009 -
Re: Thunder and the Revenant(edited)
HI 82manycookies I seem to find your work everywhere. I've read most of your Thunder and the Revenant and as I said whilst reviewing the last version of this. It ...
Jul 2, 2009 -
Re: Thunder and the Revenant(edited)
Wow you're story so far is just so action packed and exciting. I really enjoyed reading it especially the motorbike scene. Sadly the plot seems a little old and worn. ...
Jul 1, 2009 -
Re: The Inner Ones
The Inner Ones It began at the pub. I’d been drinking my beer whilst watching football. I heard the door open and turned to see if was my mate Larry; ...
Jun 30, 2009 -
Re: I hear the whistling
I've taken your advice and axed half of the I hear the whistling's
Jun 30, 2009 -
Re: deleted short story
Hi, I read you short werewolf story and found it rather predictable. For a start there was no surprise about him becoming a werewolf because of the title and what ...
Jun 30, 2009 -
Re: Maxim (Prologue)
I have to say it's a little bit confusing and jumpy. It's quite hard to work out who's talking but the plot so far is brilliant and I like the ...
Jun 28, 2009 -
Re: Escape from Conel. Chapter 1; Over and out
I'm confused. -Have the humans of earth taken their inter-world war out into space? -Why is it the Royal Navy? Shouldn't it be Air Force or Space Force etc? Despite ...
Jun 28, 2009 -
Re: I hear the whistling
I hear the whistling I hear the whistling. It chases me, It blows everything away. It began in the cemetery, It was born from the wind. I hear the whistling. ...
Jun 28, 2009 -
Re: Fighting
Well done I like your poem its really strong and bold with emotion but like someone else said i suggest that you make a little less blunt and take some ...
Jun 28, 2009 -
Re: ~ Risen ~
This is amazing! I'm so glad you reviewed mine and asked me to review yours because if you hadn't I would never of have found it because I don't normally ...
Jun 26, 2009 -
Re: The Regiments, Prologe
I'm really liking the sound of the story so far as it already talks of betrayal, vampires magic potions, war and in general lots of exciting things. Sadly i think ...
Jun 26, 2009 -
Re: Chapter 1 /The invasion
Chapter 1 Sam began the uphill climb towards his house. He had just enjoyed a few hours of Xbox 360 and P.S.P with his mate. Now he was dreading school ...
Jun 26, 2009 -
Re: The prologue (no title)
Prologue “Get the Nuclear warheads prepped and ready for war now Major Sieska!” shouted the General. “Yes Sir,” she replied, whilst frantically typing at her computer. “Jenkins, I want the ...
Jun 26, 2009
